Tri completely changed my life

Tri Changed My life

People say that, and sure it might be true in one or two ways.  For me, it turned the whole damn thing upside down.  I met two of my closest friends through tri, ladies that should probably be sisters- you know who you are.  The laughs, the encouragement, the love, yeah- they are awesome.  Last season was a turning point, a holy cow, I love this moment.  A, this makes me a better person, a nicer person, a calmer person moment.  I looked forward to this year, this season, the races, the people, the training, the therapy. 

For those of you that don't know, tri changed my life in a way I never dreamed 2 months ago.  I wanted to  sign up for a race... but dear God if I'm pregnant, I don't want to waste my money.  Pee on a stick... holy... wow!  Here we go, whole 'nother sort of ride.  We were psyched, we couldn't have been happier.  I calculated.  Instead of Racing Maryland, I'd be having a baby.  This was awesome.  Life couldn't be better.   I figured I would try to still race, train, short local stuff, no stress.  Then, life changed again.  I had a ruptured ectopic pregnancy.  I bled into my belly until I nearly passed out.  No risk factors.  No reason.  No explanation.  Emergency surgery and a depth of hole that I mentally couldn't climb out of.

Until I was cleared to train and tri.  Thank God.  I felt like me again.  I felt like I was a person, albeit sad, but functional.  My yards were my therapy.  I sweat out my loss.  I pounded out my frustration.  This was how I would recover, I would Tri.  About 5 seconds later I was signed up for Lake Placid.  I had a goal, and it was a close one.  Only a few months away.  It was time to crank.  Time to mark the workouts on the calendar.  Yep.  I could do this.

I'm still sad.  I still have bad days, I still have no understanding of this whole thing, but then I tri.  Then I meet fellow triathletes and aspirating incredible athletes.  I meet people that push me hard and encourage me through.  I meet swimmers who make me work harder than I have since college.  I gain a slew of instantaneous friends, lanemates, bike-buddies, run-crazies all because of this incredible sport.  All because we tri.  I feel like life is continuing, and that everything has its place and that I can laugh again.... laugh hard again, all because I tri.

Tri changed my life- I love every second.

Are you Resolute?

So funny how the idea of a new year brings the idea of a new beginning, a year of possibilities, a fresh start.  We can't seem to draw a line in the sand and say enough is enough, but a ball drops, the champagne flows and Old Lang Syne plays and we are ready to begin again.  Today I drove past 2 gyms and a state park that typically have only a few cars parked in them, but today.... there were no open spaces and they were parked all the way out to the street and then some.  I couldn't help but giggle and hope that this lasts longer than most years.

My new year started the day of the surgery.  I made a promise to myself that I would wait 5 weeks to start working out again.  I felt good enough that I wanted to long before today, but I owed it to myself to not.  Swim bike run.... nope.  Today I clamored onto the treadmill and walked a long 2 miles.

I am more proud of that two miles than I am about many longer distances.  You laugh at that possibility, but that two miles stood for a change, stood for a commitment to myself and my health.  I am recovering strong and smart, and hopefully making a stronger and smarter woman of myself.

I would like to lay out a resolution, but what?  There are so many specific things that I have aimed for in the past that just have not been important enough to follow through over the course of 12 months.  I looked up the most popular resolutions, here are a few

Lose Weight/Eat Healthy/Get Fit
Quit Smoking/Drinking
Manage Stress
Manage Debt/Save Money
Get a better job
Volunteer
Travel

People are incredibly predictable.  We are so lucky and blessed in so many ways.  So spoiled to have a roof over our heads and mortgages to stress us out, jobs to hate, enough money and food to overeat and gain weight.  We hate ourselves for these blessings, and that is scary.  I don't judge, I've been there/I'm there now. 

My resolution is to appreciate what I have.  To enjoy my days, and to find the upside.  To live my life and change how I think about things.  To put happiness, my own and my friends' and family's, first- whatever that means.  I resolve to try to ditch the grudges and give people the benefit of the doubt.

What do you think?  What do you resolve?  Is it important enough to still be at the forefront of your mind in 30 days?  6 months?  12?  There is no finish line for this resolution... its a change for life.